So much has happened in the last few months that it hardly seems real. I've been stretched and tested... and I'm still here and better for it. Granted, this isn't the journey I'd planned on embarking on, but life doesn't always pay attention to our plans. I'll be moving to New York in the fall for grad school. I'll admit that I'm still a little scared and a bit nervous to go, but it's normal. I mean, when am I ever going to have the chance to do this again? When will I ever be able to watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade live and in person? I can't wait to see what awaits me.
I'm finally healing and am actually grateful for all the crap that has happened these past several months. Without the pain and tears, I wouldn't be able to appreciate all these opportunities and I probably wouldn't be as willing to take such a huge leap of faith.
Do I still wish things would get less tense? Of course I do, but I've also realized that I can't change other people. I've done all that I could and I have to be patient. I still believe that we could be friends again sometime down the road. And I want that, I really do. But I'm not going to keep waiting around for him to grow up and mature enough to see that his actions aren't helping anyone, him in particular.
I have a date coming up, and I can't wait. While I don't think a lasting relationship will happen with this guy, I don't know that it won't.
